Let Go. Move On. Just Live.

Sometimes it’s hard for me to write continuously about the events in my life. Sometimes, I get this feeling of uncertainty, of being unsure if people are still getting inspired with what I say. Sometimes, I get the feeling that people may think I am being egoistic, trying to write so much about myself, myself and myself.

But I guess this is what blogging is all about. It’s about expressing yourself in another way. My co-blogger and friend Apple of An Apple A Day once asked me in a private conversation what challenges I encounter in a blog of my genre. I have to add something to my reply to her. 

Aside from being careful with words that I use, because bloggers in my genre talks about sensitive topics most of the time, we do not want to hurt or come on to people in a negative way. I am also aware that people would one day somehow get tired of my life’s story. 

The biggest challenge would always be to think before blogging, will my post inspire this time or not?  Will people still care with what’s happening in my life right now?

I know the answer to that. There will come a time when people would eventually grow tired of reading the same things over and over again. And when the time comes that I have stopped inspiring people with what I do, I guess that’s the time I have to conclude my blog, or else , reformat if I want to continue blogging.

Let go.

I’ve been blogging since 2008. My life has been an open book. People who read my blog have at least a share of my ups and downs. And I thank each and every one of you who laughed and cried with me through each happy and painful moments in my life. There’s been so much written, so many experiences shared, so many laughter resonated and many tears shed. And the thought that people can relate or at least empathize with every victory I share, that just inspire me to continue blogging as well.

For this post, I am officially closing that chapter in my life, as we all must go on and leave the past behind. I may still have some unfinished business (like the forgiveness thing), I guess the right time will come eventually, I don’t need to pressure myself into this.

Move on.

I just feel so free right now!  It feels like a veil has been lifted and now I can see the brightness tomorrow will bring. I realized that writing the same posts, with the same bitterness, anger and resentment, I was tying myself with my past. 

Maybe I wasn’t really ready to let go of it, holding on to it tightly, because I would also lose the familiar place, the familiar feeling of having those emotions. I got so comfortable in that space and I dreaded getting out of my comfort zone. I am scared of feeling new feelings.

Just Live.

Yes, I will continue to live. The past is the past which cannot be undone. Tonight is a turning point for me, a moment which I know I won’t regret. Tonight, I continue to live. Just live. I don’t want a mediocre life. I want more from life. I want to live life to the fullest. 

I’ll catch every opportunity life throws at me. I still want that cooking show. And I still want to be a motivational speaker. For as long as I don’t forget where I’ve come from,  take care of the children and of their future and not step on somebody to get what I want, then I know I’m on the right track. 

I will be okay.

Keeping the faith,